


What if? (one-shot collection)

by Ariendiel



Category: Love Island (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff and Angst, One Shot Collection, Short & Sweet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:09:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26283946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ariendiel/pseuds/Ariendiel
Summary: A collection of one shots for alternative in-villa scenarios, largely focused around Noah and what might have been.
Relationships: Bobby McKenzie/Main Character (Love Island), Noah/Main Character (Love Island)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 49





	1. What if he knew?

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be an anthology of litg one shots origially posted on my tumblr blog. While I personally enjoy the Noah route, there are many alternative events and scenarios I've always been curious about, and so I've decided to write a few of them down as short stories. Some of these were also suggested to me at https://ariendiel.tumblr.com/, and I'm always welcoming new ideas! 🌻

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if Bobby had found out about Noah trying to kiss his girlfriend, the girl he had to fight so hard for, the night before the finale of Love Island?

_“Did you really dream about holding me in your arms?”  
“And a few more things. I want to start with this, though…”_

Her body was tense like a drawn bow upon entering the bedroom where the vast majority of the other Islanders were fast asleep, with only the sound of soft breathing and the gentle rustling of sheets disrupting the quiet of the night. The walk back to the bed shared with Bobby seemed to take that much longer than usual, and the warmth of his body as she slid in next to him felt hot against her cool skin. Too hot. 

Her breath came fast as she restlessly tried to make herself comfortable, and Bobby easily woke having instinctively wrapped his arms around her. Peeling one eye open he looked sleepily at the beautiful girl next to him, immediately realising something was wrong.

“What wrong, lass?”

The moment of silence that followed seemed to go on forever, and Bobby’s whole body seemed to hold its breath until she finally spoke, her eyes meeting his in the dark.

“Noah just tried to kiss me.”

“He… what?”

Of course he had heard her, but his thoughts froze in disbelief as he carefully hugged her closer, a frown having crept its way onto his face as he saw the confusion and conflicting emotions in her eyes. Mouth hanging open, he was about to speak again just as she placed a delicate finger against his lips to quieten him.

“He confessed his feelings for me, and then, well, he tried to kiss me,” her voice was merely a soft whisper, almost strangely calm, and such a contrast to the burning feelings there were welling up inside him. “I turned him down of course, you’re the only one for me here, you know that, right?”

“Yeah…” What else could he say? He trusted her, he really did, but Noah had already almost turned her head once, after he himself had fucked up completely with that Operation Nope business. Now, the shy librarian, one of his best mates, had confessed his feelings for her and tried to kiss her. His girlfriend.

As he felt the rage and hurt boiling in his blood, the only thing stopping him from getting out of bed there and then was the girl in his arms. Her evident confusion and soft reassurances calmed him, making him realise that right now she needed him to stay as level-headed as possible.

“Alright, I’ll talk with him tomorrow,” he grumbled, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead. “Thanks for telling me.”

“Of course, Boops, I love you.”

“I love you too.” A small, crooked smile managed to sneak it’s way onto his face at that. Oh how he adored her. “Now get some sleep, lass.”

Eventually, as he slowly caressed her back, she eventually fell asleep in his arms, but his own mind was still racing and he was struggling to keep up with his own thoughts. One thing he knew for sure though, and that was that he would have to confront Noah about it in the morning - the day of the Finale itself. He couldn’t think of a worse time for this to have happened.

* * *

It was the last day of Love Island, and Bobby was up before everyone else, trying to distract himself by making some final-day-pancakes. He was getting more anxious and jittery by the minute as the others slowly joined him outside, and his jaw clenched tight when Noah finally arrived, clearly feeling awkward as he avoided looking at the others.

“What’s the matter, Noah?” Bobby said harshly, fixing the other man with as cold a look as he could muster. “You seem upset, almost as if you’ve just been turned down after trying to kiss someone else’s girlfriend.”

A hush instantly fell over the kitchen, tension suddenly filling the air as Noah shifted his weight nervously from one foot to the other, the silence quickly becoming unbearable.

“He did what now? He tried to kiss…” Hope’s sharp voice cut through the tension like a knife, her eyes fixed on Noah in disbelief before quickly moving to fix on Bobby’s partner. “It was _you_ , wasn’t it? You dirty little-”

“Hey!” Bobby interrupted, and quickly stepped in front of his partner just as Hope moved closer, recognising the dangerous look in her eyes. “Don’t you dare take it out on her, Hope, Noah’s the one who messed up. He hit on my girlfriend, on the last night, out of bloody nowhere, so I think I’m the one who’s got the right to be upset here!”

“Woah, slow down, both of you, what’s going on?” Gary asked through a mouthful of cereal, confusion written on his face, and Lottie rolled her eyes as she crossed her arms.

“Clearly some last minute grafting behind everyone’s backs…”

“I… It wasn’t like that.” Bobby looked at his partner as she spoke up, and he gave her a small, supportive smile. “Noah asked if we could have a chat on the roof terrace last night, and maybe it was because of it being the last day and all, or the alcohol, or both, I don’t know, but after he said he fancied me he…” All blood had drained from Noah’s face by that point, and he was slowly shaking his head, as if desperate for this not to happen right now. “… he tried to kiss me. I turned him down, of course!” She was quick to add as Hope opened her mouth to speak again. “But yeah, that’s what happened.”

“You agreed to go up on the terrace with him though,” Lottie said cooly and her eyes narrowed in scrutiny. “I’m honestly so disappointed. In both of you.”

“I thought you were my mate,” Bobby said, having turned to face Noah again, daring him to face him. “But instead you go and not only hit on her, but kiss her! The one girl I’ve ever fancied in here, and you knew that, Noah. You fucking knew how much she means to me, and you still tried to do bits with her, like some backstabbing coward!”

“We didn’t kiss,” Noah eventually spoke, his voice low. “It’s like she said, she turned me down. Don’t blame her, please, this is all on me, and only me. I should never have done it, and I’m sorry, to all of you.”

“So it’s true!” Hope’s voice was almost a screech as she turned on Noah, her fists clenched in anger. “You tried to cheat on me, you _wanted_ to cheat on me, after everything… I should’ve known better than to ever trust you. You, you…”

Her voice broke just when she seemed about to blow up, and with a cry in frustration Hope stormed off, desperately wiping her hands under her eyes.

“Well done, bastard,” Lottie hissed and got up to go after her, and Noah ran his hands over his face in despair as he looked after them.

“Bobby, I’m so sorry,” he said quietly. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen, I just-”

“You just what? Decided to try your luck with another girl on the last night? I expected better from you,” Bobby said, his anger coming to the surface as his voice rose until he was almost shouting. “Especially from you! You were my friend!”

“I’m still your friend, if you want me to be, Bobby,” Noah said gently, not making any indication that he was going to fight back, instead almost steadying himself where he stood, as if getting ready for the worst.

“You were meant to be the good one! So grown up and better than all of us in your obnoxious power couple, always shoving how you were ‘meant to be’ down our throats. Hell, I wish I’d never teamed up with Lottie to save you and Hope. If I’d only known you were gonna try and force yourself on her, my girlfriend… Go fuck yourself, Noah!”

“You’re right,” was Noah’s simple reply, the look on his face one of such heartbreak it was more than any of them had ever seen on his normally so hard-to-read features. “What I did is a betrayal of our friendship on a level I never thought I’d stoop down to, and yet… I’ve been living a lie for weeks, and I just, I just couldn’t bear it anymore, knowing Hope and I were falling apart, all while I was falling for someone else. Knowing it was our last night, and having had some drinks, it drove me to confess my feelings for her, feelings I’ve harboured for, well, a while. I should’ve never tried to kiss her, I crossed a line, and I don’t know what else to say. I’ve never been, eh, great with words. I’m sorry.”

“Way to ruin the Finale, lads,” Gary mumbled, just about having finished his cereal, glancing from one guy to the other.

“Damn it, Noah, you should’ve told us! We would’ve given you some advice, helped you deal with these feelings. We’re your friends!” Bobby slammed his fist down on the kitchen counter in frustration before taking a deep breath. “You should go have a chat with Hope, she deserves an apology too. You can come find me later so I can punch that pretty face of yours in private. Right now I think I need some time alone with her.”

* * *

Bobby fiddled with the hem of his shirt as he sat alone on the roof terrace, his girlfriend having just gone to get ready for the Finale with the other girls after a heart-to-heart conversation. Their chat had put the cheeky smile back on his face, and the butterflies back in his stomach where they belonged.

He had felt so insecure, the thought of losing her to Noah having gnawed at him the whole day, but now? He loved her and he trusted her more than ever, knowing she’d never even considered Noah as a romantic partner throughout their time on the show, that it all had been a cumulation of misunderstandings and lack of communication. She wanted _him_ , and only him. That thought alone was enough to make him grin like a fool. A fool in love.

“Hey, Bobby, mind if I, uhm, join you?” A deep, gentle voice made him sit up straight in surprise, he’d been so deep in thought he hadn’t noticed Noah walking out on the roof terrace. He’d never comprehend how such a large man managed to be so damn quiet, it had to be some librarian magic.

“Not at all, get yourself over here, mate.” Bobby’s lighthearted response was enough to make Noah visibly relax as he sat down next to him, smiling hesitantly at the cheerful baker. Giving him a closer look, Bobby raised an eyebrow at just how exhausted Noah seemed. “You look like you’ve been run over by a lorry before being mauled by rabid badgers. Now I almost feel bad for saying I’d punch you… Was the talk with Hope that bad?”

“Yeah,” Noah sighed and ran his thumb thoughtfully along his bottom lip. “We’re done. I don’t think she even wants to see me again, which is fair enough. I mean, I’ve been such an idiot.”

“Not gonna argue with that,” Bobby said, but kept his tone nonjudgemental. It was evident Noah had suffered enough. “I get it though, my girlfriend is the best after all. I just wish you’d, like, told us about your feelings sooner, you know? Would’ve made things bloody easier for all of us instead of randomly trying to kiss her. What were you thinking?”

“You’re right, and I’m so sorry, I wasn’t thinking. The panic of feeling like I was possibly losing out on love just because I’ve been so indecisive and scared made me act like a dick. But, well, you know me, mate, always…” Noah paused, and taking a deep, slow breath he gazed out towards the horizon, the setting sun of their last day in the Villa casting them both in a warm, golden light “… rushing things.”

“You fucking wanker,” Bobby snorted as an involuntary crooked grin spread across his face and he nudged Noah with his shoulder, earning him a smile from the usually so stoic librarian in return.

The smile faded again though as Noah’s eyes fixed on a point in the distance, his features set in an expression of something akin to longing and deep melancholia. “Take care of her, Bobby, alright?”

“Of course, Noah,” Bobby said gently, serious for once as he placed a hand on Noah’s shoulder. He could feel just how tense the other man still was, the day having clearly taken a toll on him, as it had on all of them. “I never thought I’d find love, and then boom! There she was, a girl even more amazing than the perfect chocolate soufflé. So don’t worry. You’ll find someone, someday, trust me.”

Noah chuckled and the corners of his mouth turned ever so slightly upwards, a hopeful gleam in his eyes.

“Someday.”


	2. What if you got to spend prom with Noah?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if Noah had found his courage sooner, and him and the woman he truly loved were finally together for the final night of Love Island?

_The last night_. The thought was almost surreal, and yet such a relief, as Noah simply couldn’t wait to be free from the cameras filming his every move every second of the day. Despite spending weeks like this, he still hadn’t gotten used to the fact that the world had access to everything bar his own thoughts, as those he got to keep to himself at least. Most of the time that was. The producers knew all too well which questions to ask in the Beach Hut to make him almost reveal his heart and soul to them as well. By now he had thankfully learnt to hold back, but he was so very tired, and was fairly certain that the only thing, no, the only person, keeping him sane was _her_.  
  
Their journey to this point had not been an easy one, far from it, but he wouldn’t change it for the world. Now, as he looked at himself in the mirror the corners of his mouth involuntarily twitched upwards, and he embraced the comforting sense of having reached the end of an adventure combined with the knowledge it was truly just the beginning of something greater.  
  
“Oy, Noah, you listening?” Gary’s voice broke his train of thought and he turned to give him a quizzical look, only to see the amused look on Gary’s face. “We’ve been trying to get your attention for ages, mate, you lost in your own thoughts again?”  
  
“Yeah, uhm, sorry,” Noah muttered and gave the other guys a small, but cheerful smile. There were so few of them left now, when it seemed like only yesterday that the place had been borderline overcrowded. Now it was just himself, Gary, Bobby and Ibrahim left, out of all the guys that had both entered and left the Villa. “What did you want?”  
  
“Bobby needs help with his bowtie,” Gary nodded in the direction of the Scot while at the same time shoving his shirt down his trousers, at least trying to make himself a bit more presentable for tonight’s prom.  
  
“No, I don’t,” Bobby protested, a look of both frustration and determination on his face as he once more tried to wrangle the piece of fabric around his neck into the shape of a bow. “I almost had it that time, urgh, why is this so bloody hard? I’m usually so good with my hands…”  
  
“That’s what she said, eyy,” Gary grinned, making Ibrahim chuckle from where he was ironing his blazer, the poor piece of clothing having suffered from having been hidden at the bottom of a pile for weeks on end.  
  
“Noah, please?” Bobby finally gave in with a sigh and looked towards Noah with his best puppy eyes, and Noah couldn’t help but smile a little at how lost he seemed, evidently not having worn a shirt and tie since his school boy days.  
  
“Alright.” Noah stepped over and took the by now rather sad looking piece of cloth, trying to straighten it again before gently placing it back around Bobby’s neck. Deftly moving his fingers, he’d soon tied a lovely bowtie and gave a satisfied nod at the finished product. “There, all done.”  
  
“Thanks, mate,” Bobby grinned up at him before turning to look at himself in the mirror, automatically straightening and pretended to twirl an invisible moustache. “Straight outta Downton Abbey.”  
  
“Not sure they wore Hawaii print blazers in the 1920s,” Noah said and frowned a little, but nonetheless gave him a small pat on the shoulder. “You look good though, Chelsea will love it.” He was just glad they’d talked him out of wearing just a t-shirt with his blazer, knowing Chelsea would want to see Bobby make an effort for their last night in the Villa.  
  
“Yeah, you look well dapper,” Gary nodded approvingly. “I’m just hoping Lottie will approve of my outfit… Enough to distract her from my speech at least.”  
  
“I’m sure it’ll be fine, bro,” Rahim said as he pulled his blazer on, finally satisfied, and Noah had to admit to himself the golfer really did look great in a suit. “I’m more nervous about the dancing. Jo was super patient with me when we rehearsed earlier, but I just kept messing it up and stepping on her toes.”  
  
“I’m kind of happy Chelsea’s as clumsy as me,” Bobby said, sounding almost defeatist before the cheeky gleam returned to his eyes, “but I’m not sure anything can top Noah and Gary going at it earlier anyways. That kiss, my friends, was quite exquisite.”  
  
“Oh, you jealous?” Gary said with a wink and crossed his arms, as if daring Bobby to say yes, to which Bobby’s grin just widened.  
  
“Of course! Have you seen the luscious lips on this man?” Bobby exclaimed, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, and gestured towards Noah to make his point clear. Feeling himself growing flustered as the others laughed, Noah simply smiled and stuck his hands in his pockets to stop himself from fidgeting. “No wonder he’s so popular with the ladies.”  
  
“I’m not popular…” Noah tried, but that only earned himself an eye-roll from Gary and a crooked smile from Rahim.  
  
“Keep telling yourself that, Mr Love Island,” Bobby teased before turning towards the mirror again to give himself a final once-over. It was almost time.  
  
Suddenly nervous, Noah faced the mirror again as well, fiddling a bit with his tie as he took a few deep breaths to calm himself, looking at himself in his navy suit and hoping she’d like it. Taking a little note out of his pocket, he quickly read over the short speech he’d penned, committing it to memory as he thoughtfully ran his thumb along his bottom lip. There was so much he wanted to say, but simply didn’t know how to. Before, he would have started to worry, worry that it wouldn’t be good enough, but not anymore. With her he felt calm, reassured, and at times even courageous. He had spent too long with Hope, not seeing the wonderful woman right in front of him, and the choice he’d made after Casa Amor had been a difficult one. Sending Hope home had been an act of bravery that had shaken up the whole Villa, but he regretted nothing as he now knew his heart was where it belonged: in her safekeeping.  
  
“Noah, mate, you coming?” The sound of Rahim’s voice made him turn, his own anxious gaze meeting one of heartfelt understanding in the other man’s eyes. “You’ll be fine, now come and let’s enjoy the party. One last time.”

* * *

Taking a small sip of champagne, Noah smiled as he quietly listened to Bobby go on about his intricate plans for all the Love Island themed pastries he’d make upon his return to Glasgow, in the bakery he planned to start of course. The Scot always talked more when he was nervous, and tonight was no exception. Gary meanwhile kept checking that his shirt was properly tucked in while simultaneously joining Rahim in egging Bobby on as his ideas became increasingly more ludicrous, causing Noah to smile and shake his head in amusement.  
  
“I dunno, I think Chelsea would love a giant pug cake,” Rahim said, thoughtfully scratching his chin while also twirling the champagne flute he held in his other hand, “it just depends on how large and how pink you make it.”  
  
“It’s not all about size, mate,” Gary smiled, nudging the other man teasingly, and Rahim laughed as he caught on.  
  
“Exactly, it’s about how it tastes,” Bobby winked. “Definitely won’t want a soggy bottom!”  
  
“And don’t forget how it feels in the mouth, and how _satisfying_ it is,” Gary continued, starting a sequence of baking innuendos that got progressively worse but helped cover up their nerves at least. Noah smiled a little but struggled to engage as he desperately tried to stop himself from constantly shifting his gaze towards the Villa. The girls would emerge any minute now, as always taking their sweet time and making the lads almost lose their minds in anticipation.  
  
Finally, the sound of heels made them all instantly fall silent and turn, and he could’ve sworn he heard Gary gasp as Lottie strode into view first, her black gown glistening in the light as it clung to her body. The Aussie stopped and smirked happily as Gary hurried over to her, unable to wait for the girls to reach them. Chelsea wore pink, of course, and looked like a sparkling glass of rosé as Bobby scooped her up into his arms and twirled her around, making her giggle. Jo had already made her way over to Rahim as well, but Noah had stopped paying attention, having just spotted _her_ behind the others, slowly and gracefully making her way towards him.  
  
She filled his vision and made his heart swell in his chest, time slowed and the world shrunk, for she was all that mattered, and she was glorious. Rendered speechless, all Noah could do was stare in awe, and only when she smiled in adoring amusement at his expression did he finally inhale sharply as a wide smile spread across his own face.  
  
“You look… you look, uh…” Noah stuttered as he took her in his arms, gently hugging her close to his chest and feeling the warmth of her skin through the soft fabric of her dress. Closing his eyes for a moment he gave up on talking and simply pressed a kiss to her forehead.  
  
“What?” She asked teasingly while she gazed up at him, and he found himself unable to stop smiling as he tenderly cupped her face in his hands, his dark golden eyes meeting hers.  
  
“You’re beautiful.” It was a simplified statement compared to how he truly felt, words as always failing him when he needed them most, but the look in his eyes said more than words and her eyes watered in response, glistening in the warm lights of the illuminated garden. She understood.

* * *

To the sound of the slow, romantic music, Noah gently swayed with her in his arms, guiding them through the moves they had practiced earlier and which he had made such an effort to memorise. With the speeches out of the way it was as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, and he smiled as he remembered the words they’d shared, and the promises, dreams, and hopes they’d contained.  
  
With the stars gently twinkling above and her head resting against his chest as they moved, Noah didn’t ever want this moment to end. For possibly the first time in the Villa he felt completely at ease, and as if he was where, and with who, he belonged.  
  
As the music changed and the couples joined together again, he finally let go of all restraint and decided to simply have fun. Exhilarated, sweat glistening on his brow, he was laughing with the others at the increasingly more ridiculous moves they pulled - his own twerking having left Bobby utterly amazed and borderline speechless for once.  
  
“Blimey,” Gary laughed and scratched his head, an arm across Lottie’s shoulders. “That was actually pretty fucking impressive.”  
  
“So that’s what you do at the library when nobody’s watching, huh?” Lottie gave him a teasing look. “Practicing your dance moves?”  
  
“Wow,” was all Bobby managed, and Noah felt his cheeks grow hot in embarrassment at the attention he was receiving.  
  
“I guess having a younger sister forcing me to dance with her finally paid off,” he said shyly, but still smiling as he realised that they weren’t about to make fun of him like others had done before, and that he truly had made some friends for life in addition to finding love.  
  
“Enough twerking, guys, it’s time for the pool!” Chelsea cried out impatiently, her energy levels after a couple of drinks through the roof, and Bobby eagerly grabbed her hand as they rushed towards the infinity pool together. The undisturbed surface of the water perfectly reflected the night sky above, until the two of them, giggling and laughing, jumped into it with an impressively large splash.  
  
Gary, Lottie, Ibrahim and Jo followed suit, and Noah turned to his partner with a smile, offering her his hand. “You ready?”  
  
“Always.” She smiled, taking his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze before they leapt into the cool water together.  
  
“I honestly didn’t think I would get this wet,” Lottie chuckled as they broke the surface, wiping her hair away from her face. “Thank god for waterproof mascara, nothing can smudge this baby.”  
  
“Is that a challenge, ma’am?” Bobby raised an eyebrow at her, a wide smile on his face, and didn’t even give her a chance to reply before starting to splash around. Missing Lottie however he ended up hitting Rahim and Jo, ruining their romantic moment and instantly instigating a water fight.  
  
While most joined in, Noah instead opted to slowly move them away from the others and towards the edge of the pool, where it looked like the water met the horizon as it glimmered in reflected lights of silver and gold. Whereas he could still comfortably stand, she couldn’t, but she simply smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, holding herself close while floating lightly against him, her dress dancing slowly around her legs.  
  
“This is just... perfect,” she sighed softly, looking at the rolling hills beyond the Villa being bathed in moonlight. Noah on the other hand couldn’t take his eyes off her as he held her close. He’d completely forgotten they were fully clothed in a pool, with everything being shown on TV later. It didn’t matter.  
  
“Yes, you are.” It was but a whisper, yet she still heard and turned to face him again. Placing a hand against her cheek, his thumb lightly caressed her and he could feel her heart flutter in her chest as she pressed herself more firmly against him.  
  
Unable to resist her, he closed the space between them and their lips came together in a rush of heat. All other sounds faded away, and Noah lost himself to the fire on her lips, feeding his soul with passion and warmth. Her sweet lips pressed harder into his and he groaned quietly as a shiver went up his spine, his blood running hot.  
  
Eventually managing to pull apart, both of them short of breath after the intensity of the kiss and looking at each other in amazement, almost laughing with giddiness. Smiling, Noah rested his forehead tenderly against hers and closed his eyes again, for once knowing exactly what to say.  
  
“I love you.”


	3. What if he took the money?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if Noah and Hope had won Love Island, but he chose to keep the price money and break up with Hope to be with someone else?

_ And the winners of Love Island are… Hope and Noah! _

Noah felt his jaw drop as the text was read out loud, and his eyes instantly went over to  _ her _ , desperately trying to gauge her reaction, before Hope flung her arms around him. Squealing in joy, and holding on to him so tightly he started to feel short of breath, Hope was clearly euphoric. He on the other hand could not get the image of the worry and sadness on the face of the one who mattered most to him off his mind.

“Omg, babes, we won! We won!”

It felt as though his body was frozen in place. Unable to move or muster a sound, making for a stark contrast to his ecstatic partner. Slowly, the trance was broken and he blinked, looking at Hope and managing a small smile.

“Yeah, uh, I guess we did,” he said, trying to sound as enthusiastic as he could, but even to him it sounded flat. “Wow.” 

Part of him was happy, how could he not be? After a month in this Villa, in front of the cameras that made him so uncomfortable, it felt as though it was all finally paying off. Another part of him however, slowly growing larger and eating him up from the inside, dreaded the consequences. 

“I can’t believe it,” Hope was running her hands across her cheeks, despite no tears being present, as she grinned and turned to look at the other two couples. His eyes however darted towards her again, and only her, wishing now more than ever that he could read her mind as she stood next to Bobby, offering him a small smile. Returning it, he held her gaze for a moment longer than necessary, desperately hoping she understood the turmoil he was going through.

“Congratulations,” Bobby had quickly wiped the disappointment off his face and stepped over to hug Hope and him. “Well deserved.”

Bobby and her had been in a rather evident friendship couple for most of their time on the show, despite trying for a bit after Casa Amor it had never gone anywhere. Still, the public had loved the silly antics of the baker and his best friend, and so they had made the Finale. No more though.

“Thanks, mate,” Noah said softly as he returned the hug, wondering if they could tell just how panicked he was. Heart racing in his chest, he knew the most nerve wracking moment was yet to come. He had a choice to make.

Fairly sure Hope was talking at him, he still struggled to truly listen as they were shepherded out after all the others, to stand on a stage being drowned in the rapturous sound of applause while being presented as the winners of this year's Love Island. As Noah looked at the crowd, trying to spot a familiar face, it struck him that it was the first time in over a month that he’d seen people other than how fellow Islanders.

Swallowing hard, he felt Hope take his hand and give it a firm squeeze as they turned to watch the screen above the stage, reliving their best moments from the Villa.

Watching the sweet moments of the first week especially hurt. When his feelings for Hope had been genuine and warm, before everything had turned sour, and now only left him with a bad taste in his mouth. Seeing them together like this, he wondered if there was anything he could’ve done differently, if it was his fault their arguments had grown more frequent and more volatile. They had clearly been happy together, so where had it all gone wrong?

“Now, you have a choice to make,” the host said, a blindingly white smile glued onto their face, which Noah had always found rather unnerving. “But first, let's find out who’s got the envelope with the money!”

Noah and Hope stood facing each other, Noah’s eyes downcast as he looked at the envelopes, lost in thought until Hope spoke.

“I’ll just take this one,” she smiled, and with a confident shrug picked up the one closest to her, one hand still resting on the table, tapping at it nervously with her long nails.

“Alright,” he bit his bottom lip somewhat as he picked up his own envelope. It felt heavy in his hands as he slowly started opening it, already knowing what it would read when he heard Hope sigh. He knew that sound all too well. It spoke of disappointment.

Glancing up at her, he managed a small, nervous smile as he met her eyes. Those beautiful eyes that had once enticed him so now seemed almost cold as he turned the piece of paper in his hands to show the world what it said, one of his legs twitching with nervous energy.

“Looks like Noah has the money, a grand total of £50,000!” The host’s smile widened, something Noah had thought impossible, and the audience erupted into a round of whoops and cheers. “So, now the choice is yours, will you share the money… or take it for yourself?”

Finally, the crowd stilled and silence fell over them like a heavy blanket, almost suffocating in its intensity. Usually he enjoyed quiet, but this made his chest tighten and his breath come faster, his own heartbeat suddenly unbearably loud. Closing his eyes for a moment, he expelled all thoughts, only to focus on _ her _ . The memories of the short but meaningful moments they’d shared calmed his mind and for the first time he clearly saw in his mind’s eye what he had to do.

“I’m taking the money.”

* * *

The first following minutes were a blur of producers, short interviews and people dragging him in all directions, leaving him disoriented and overwhelmed. Barely having come to grips with what he himself had just done, Noah was now having to try and explain himself to people whom he’d barely met before.

It was all too much, and he soon mumbled some rubbish excuses to escape it all, partially to get away but also because he knew he had more to do. He needed to talk with Hope, to try and explain. And apologise.

“Hey, uhm, do you know where Hope went?” He asked as he finally found Rahim in the crowd, nervously running his thumb along his bottom lip while he glanced around. No matter what everyone else thought, he knew he’d always have a friend in the golfer.

“Inside I think.” Rahim gave him a concerned look and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Lottie pulled her aside to try and calm her, not sure if it’ll have worked though, she was quite mad… You sure you wanna do this, bro?”

“Yeah, I have to,” he sighed and nodded, mostly to himself than to the other man, affirming his own decision to himself. “She deserves an explanation from me, you know?”

“I know, and I’m happy that you’re finally standing up for yourself, but just...” Rahim paused and smiled, giving his shoulder a quick squeeze before letting go. “Good luck.”

Gratefully returning the smile, Noah took a deep breath and turned to head inside - to face one of his greatest fears - but he was in too deep now and it was too late to turn back. Hands in his pockets, Noah deftly maneuvered through the throngs of people, refusing to be distracted, until he was inside the Villa again. The contrast was significant, and the quiet this time was very welcome. Only the muffled sounds from outside could still be heard in addition the gentle voice of a consoling Lottie, and a sobbing Hope.

Clenching his fists in determination, he walked towards the sound, eventually coming upon them in the lounge. The look Lottie gave him however made him stop in his tracks.

“What do  _ you _ want?” The Aussie almost hissed, and Hope looked up from where she sat, face buried in her hands, to glare at him. Her bloodshot eyes fixed intently on him, and he uncomfortably shifted his weight.

“I, eh, I wondered if I, uhm,” he stopped himself and closed his eyes for a second to collect himself, his lizard subconsciousness getting the better of him. “I just wanted to talk with Hope. If that’s alright?”

“I don’t think-” Lottie started, voice raised, but she was cut short by Hope.

“It’s alright, Lottie,” she mumbled, wiping her hands across her cheeks, lips pressed tightly together as she faced him. “We need to talk, anyway. He’s got some fucking explaining to do.”

“If you’re sure,” Lottie did not look convinced, but regardless got up to leave the two of them alone. On her way out she drew her finger across her throat and basically bared her teeth at him. The threat could not have been clearer and he swallowed hard before stepping over towards the couch and cautiously sitting down, keeping what felt like a safe distance from Hope.

“So, uhm,” he scratched the back of his neck, no clue what to say or where to start. “How’re you doing?”

“How am I doing!?” Hope looked at him in disbelief and he felt his face grow hot in embarrassment, knowing this wasn’t exactly off to a great start. As always he seemed to just make things worse. “What the fuck, Noah, how do you think I’m doing? You just made a fool of me in front of everyone, for the whole world to see, and for what? Was it your plan all along? To steal the money? Why!?”

His heart broke seeing her like this, still so proud but barely holding it together as she yelled at him, and he knew she deserved to know. Shrinking into himself, he struggled to find the right words, for some reason he always had around her. It was part of what made them an impossible match he now knew. If only they’d seen that sooner.

“I had to end it, Hope,” he finally spoke, slowly as to not trip over his own words again. “I-”

“End what, pacifically?” She snapped before he had the chance to go on, eyes narrow as she regarded him coldly.

“Just let me speak, please?” Noah pleaded with her, knowing he couldn’t let her talk over him. Not this time. Sighing in relief as she simply nodded, he went on. “Us, Hope, I had to end us. We’ve been doing nothing but argue for the last week, and I’ve been so tired. So have you, I believe. I don’t make you happy, Hope. We don’t make each other happy, and that’s just… Well, it’s not how it should be.”

“So you what? Decided to do a fucking surprise break up, in front of _ everyone _ ? You’re such a dick!” Raising her voice again, a few angry tears escaped her eyes while she gesticulated. “Why didn’t you tell me? You fucking coward.”

He flinched at that, knowing it was more true than he’d like to admit, but he couldn’t let her fury silence him. “There’s more, Hope…”

“More?” She scowled and crossed her arms, fixing him with such an intense look he had to look down at his hands where they lay limp in his lap. Knowing she would find out sooner or later anyways, his next words came easier than he’d expected.

“I kissed her last night.”

When Hope didn’t immediately reply he was quite sure his heart stopped beating as the tension in the room rose to become nearly unbearable. Finally though, she spoke, although it was more of a furious whisper. “You. Did. WHAT?”

“After you’d all gone to bed,” he said gently, his shoulders up by his ears as he simply decided to confess it all. She deserved as much. “We talked, and, well, then we kissed. Nothing more, I swear! Her and I have liked each other for a while, and I think you’ve known that, Hope, ever since Casa Amor things haven’t been the same between us. We haven’t been… happy, and I don’t know much about relationships, granted, but that’s not right.”

“You bloody bastard,” her voice cracked and a weak sob escaped her, but in her eyes were a fire of burning hot fury. “You gave up on us, that’s what you did. Gave up. Like the spineless, cheating coward you are. I should’ve picked Lucas when I had the chance!” She spat the last words at him, and while he flinched at it he didn’t disagree.

“I’m sorry, Hope,” he said and looked at her, hoping she saw how true his words were, and yet he knew it wouldn’t be enough. Nothing he said ever seemed to be good enough for her, and it only made him stutter and stumble even more. “I shouldn’t have done it this way, but I didn’t, uhm, I didn’t know how else to do it. I feel like you never let me speak, but I needed to end it.”

“Unbelievable… Just break up with me to my face like a man!” She cried out in annoyance and frustration. “Instead you slither off to be with that slag behind my back and then steal my money, you piece of shit. Hope the fame and the price I helped you win makes you fucking miserable.”

“I’m sorry,” Noah mumbled again, knowing she was saying everything she could to hurt him, and that he probably deserved it. “But we’re done. I’m sorry.”

“Fuck off,” she mumbled, tears streaming down her face, and with a sigh he got up to leave.

Running his hand through his hair as he exited the Villa again he knew he hadn’t salvaged their friendship, far from it, but he had been honest at least, both to himself and to her. He’d hurt her, and it was something he’d always carry with him, a shame for the world to witness. However, it was done and he knew he would have to live with his choices now, and his choice was  _ her _ , as it always should’ve been.

* * *

Noah was sure of where he’d find her before he even saw her, sitting so peacefully by the pool and partially hidden, away from everyone else. The sounds of laughter and music grew fainter, and the hard lump of sadness and tension in his chest started to loosen its hold of him as he admired her: she was breathtaking, the lights of the garden and the night sky above reflecting off the water onto her and dancing across her beautiful features while she slowly moved her feet in the cool water.

When she noticed him approaching she turned, and the smile she gifted him as she looked up at him almost made him come undone.

“Hey,” he said softly as he sat down next to her, removing his own shoes to join her, sending ripples out across the surface. It felt so peaceful.

“Hi.” He could feel her regarding him, studying him, and he hoped she wasn’t judging him for what he’d just done. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing her as well.

“I broke up with Hope,” he said, gently wetting his lips, his eyes downcast. “You probably figured, after the whole price money debacle thing, but I just, uhm, wanted to tell you, you know.”

Letting out the breath he hadn’t realised he was holding, he felt one of her soft hands against his cheek as she gently turned his face so he would look at her. Pulling him closer, she pressed a tender kiss to his forehead, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. A few tears fell from his eyes as he finally, truly relaxed, letting her nearness and presence soothe him, and he realised just how draining the last couple of days had been.

“I’m proud of you,” she said softly, holding him close as Noah slowly breathed in her perfume, letting her calm him as he cried. Feeling a few of her own tears falling onto his face, he knew this had been difficult for her as well, and he silently swore to himself to never hurt her again.

Slowly, he tilted his head up, until the two of them were eye to eye. Tentatively moving closer, until his nose touched hers, a smile spread across his face as their lips finally met. For a while, nothing else mattered as they lost themselves in the kiss, knowing that come what may, they had each other, and that was enough.


	4. What if he had to choose?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if Noah actually had to choose between Hope and MC at the day 22 recoupling?

The sun had set, enveloping the land in a deep darkness only broken by the Villa’s dim artificial lighting and the flickering flames of the firepit, around which they were all now gathered in a suspenseful silence. Despite the night being warm, and the nearness of the fire, Noah felt a chill run through him as the girls found their places across from Marisol, himself, and the other boys; whose task it was to choose tonight. Oh how much Noah would’ve given to be on the other side, and to simply wait and be passive until the choice was made for him. However, he knew now that he couldn’t keep going like that, despite how comforting it was. It was a deceitful sense of comfort, stopping him from being happy. _Truly_ happy. But would he have the courage to overcome his own yearning for the familiar? He didn’t know.

Whereas the others chatted among themselves before the first text was received, Noah let his eyes wander over to _her_ , unable to resist the pull she had on him, lingering for a few seconds to bask in her warmth before moving on to meet Hope’s gaze. Having shaped his experience on the show thus far in both the best but also the most challenging ways, they both meant so much to him, and he knew they deserved having him finally make his mind up. He just wished it hadn’t come down to this.

Nervously shifting his gaze around, trying not to stare at the two that were occupying his mind for too long, Noah quietly watched and listened to the other Islanders as they got to make their choices, waiting for his time to come. His heart was beating faster and more erratically as first Marisol got to couple with Graham, of course, followed by Gary picking Lottie, and Lucas choosing Elisa. So far it was evident the producers were saving the drama until the end, and Noah inhaled sharply to try and calm himself. He should have expected as much. After all, this was likely going to be the last chance the guys got at making this decision, and that realisation made the choice all the more difficult. It wasn’t something he wanted to rush. If given the chance he probably would’ve postponed the decision indefinitely - as he had always done - but not anymore.

After Bobby had picked Chelsea - the bubbly blonde flinging her arms enthusiastically around the grinning Scot - Noah glanced over at Rahim and offered his mate an apprehensive smile. Having talked earlier, both were acutely aware that no matter what, they would both hurt someone they cared about this evening. As a consequence, they had promised to stand by each other regardless of what happened, and without that support, Noah wasn’t sure if he’d have been able to go through with this.

It was with a sad little smile that Noah watched his friend announce that he’d decided to dump Shannon for Jo. A surprise to everyone else perhaps, but Noah had known. The shock and surprised murmurs that suddenly broke the tense moment however made him anxious as to what they would think if he didn’t pick Hope. Everyone wanted him to choose Hope it seemed, to maintain the Villa status quo, to keep things as they were. 

Familiar. Safe. _Unhappy_.

When his turn came next (saved until the very end of course), and he stepped forwards, he was still struggling to focus his thoughts with everyone’s expectations resting heavily on him. His eyes travelled across the girls, before coming to rest on a point in the distance: on a star glimmering above the horizon, so beautiful and distant, and seemingly unmoving. Locked in place for eternity.

“This is not an easy decision,” he said slowly after gently wetting his lips, not sure if his voice would hold as he finally dared to meet her eyes. He could drown in those eyes. “While I know you all have come to expect, eh, certain things of me, I need to make sure I also do what’s right for me. And for the ones I care very deeply for.” Giving Shannon an apologetic look she simply gave him a court nod in return, knowing she wasn’t going to be chosen by him and clearly still coming to terms with just having ‘lost’ to Jo.

“The last few days have been, well, difficult, for lack of a better word,” he started, never had he had to come to such brutal terms with his own desires before, let alone having to speak them confidently. “Hope and I have pretty much been together since the beginning, and she’s such an incredible woman that despite our ups and down I feel very lucky to have gotten to know her.”

Hope offered him a small smile at that, and he almost faltered in his resolution when he saw the expression of nervous anticipation on her face. Rarely had he seen her so vulnerable, and it hurt. Was he making the right choice? 

“But, uhm,” he stuttered, his gaze flickering over to _her_ , standing quietly next to Hope, and his mind calmed once more. Yes, he had to do this. For her. For them. “But during our time here, I’ve slowly fallen for someone else.” Unable to look at Hope as he heard her draw a sharp breath, so close to a sob, he instead looked at the fire separating them; at the flames dancing in the darkness and occasionally throwing a spark up towards the night sky.

“I have to be true to myself, and all of you. Despite the feeling I get of having to please everyone, and the fear of being a disappointment, I think I’ve finally learnt to be confident enough to go for what, and who, I want, and I think this girl feels the same. She’s so kind, and generous, and utterly breathtaking, and she’s making me realise what love might feel like.” Noah’s voice had grown calmer, and more self-assured as he spoke, and he smiled a little to himself. His heart was still racing in his chest, but the panic was subsiding as he made his final decision. 

“So, I’m sorry, Hope, but I can’t choose you. You deserve someone who can make you happy, who gives you what you need in a relationship, and that’s not me.”

Daring to lock eyes with Hope, he saw the stinging hurt and disappointment on her face, and a flicker of anger in the tears streaming from her eyes, before he turned to face _her_. Finally speaking her beautiful name, declaring for the world that he’d chosen her, all other sounds faded and time slowed as she rushed towards him. The look on her face, so full of joy and relief, almost broke his heart as he realised how pained she must have been while waiting for him to find his courage.

As he embraced her, Noah felt as though an immense weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Blocking out the sounds of the other Islanders’ disbelief, he allowed himself to simply enjoy this little moment with her, knowing he’d made the right decision: After all this time, it was her. It had always been her.

* * *

After the initial shock had died down, the girls having done their best to comfort Hope and Shannon - Lottie in particular giving Noah and Ibrahim looks that he knew meant she was mentally cursing them both - they were told to pack their belongings and get ready to leave. It all felt surreal to him, and the disbelief on everyone else's faces told him they largely felt the same way.

“I need to say goodbye to her,” he mumbled to the girl he still held in his arms, a hand lightly stroking her back, already unwilling to let go of her. “I need to, uhm, you know…”

“You need closure,” she offered, and he gave her a grateful look.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Thanks for understanding. As always.” Leaning down, Noah hesitated for only a moment before he carefully pressed a kiss to her lips. Even that brief instant was enough to reignite that spark he’d felt before Casa Amor, the moment that had changed everything. It was something he had almost realised too late, but when he was with her, he felt so utterly content and comfortable, like he could finally be himself. In a sense, he felt fearless.

With a grateful smile he left her to talk with the others before he headed towards the Villa. Hope deserved a personal goodbye from him, although he feared her reaction to what had just occurred. After what he had just been through, this didn’t seem that difficult anymore after all.

“Hey,” he said after gently knocking on the doorframe leading into the bedroom, making both Hope and Shannon look over from where they were busy packing. “Mind if, uhm, we have a chat, Hope?”

A flicker of hurt and annoyance crossed her face before she simply sighed in resignation and stood up. “Sure, roof terrace?”

Noah nodded and together they headed back, sitting down on the softly padded seats and awkwardly looking at each other. It would’ve been a beautiful night if it weren't for the circumstances.

“So,” Hope finally spoke after having watched him struggle to find the right words. “This is it, huh?”

“I’m sorry, Hope,” Noah rubbed his chin uncomfortably, still not sure what to say. “I wanted it to work out with us, I really did, but-”

“But you fell in love with someone else.” Hope seemed almost frail where she sat across from him, sadly looking out across the Villa and the landscape beyond. It really did feel like its own small world at times. “You know, I want to be sad and shocked, and fucking mad at you, because you deserve it. But I’m not. I’m not even surprised, really. It feels like we’ve been trying to swim against the current for so long, we didn’t even notice how draining it was until we stopped.”

Noah nodded, and part of him still wanted to pull her close and comfort her, because he truly did care for her. As a friend. “Yeah, I should've seen it sooner, before Casa Amor, that things weren’t as they should be. I’m, uh, sorry I didn’t tell you about my feelings sooner though. I feel like such an idiot for not being honest with you, but I was scared, which I see now I shouldn’t have been, but, well, you know I’m not very good with words and I was afraid of letting people down. Although I think I did that anyway...”

Hope concurred with a small nod of her head and sighed. “Yeah, you did, Noah, but I’m more annoyed at myself to be honest. Like, I don’t feel like I’ve been true to myself, getting stuck in this situation when I could’ve avoided it. It’s not like me to stay in a bad relationship. No offence, babe.”

“None taken,” Noah almost chuckled. It was strange, but it was almost a relief to see her like this, so strong and resilient. This was the real Hope, not angry or frustrated, but ambitious and daring, and so very much living up to her name. Looking at her now, Noah could remember why he’d initially fallen for her, but he also saw how poorly matched they truly were. Yet he didn’t regret anything. No, he _couldn’t_ regret anything, because without Hope he would never have learnt to be brave enough to do what he’d done tonight.

“It wasn’t all bad though, was it?” Hope asked slowly after a pause, finally looking at him, her eyes blank with tears as they shared a small smile. There was a sense of finality at that moment, the air between them no longer quite as tense, and Noah let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding.

“No. No, it wasn’t.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be my last one-shot for a while (not sure how long), as I have other projects to work on. However, if you have suggestions for things you'd like to see, please leave a comment and I might have a go at writing more "what if" scenarios 💛


End file.
